On (or close to) Schedule

I got a gig to go to fancy dinners and chat with rich people.

Him: You really don't know? They want you because of how you look.

Me: (surprised) You're kidding me. What about my resume?

Him: (shrugging) Didn't even look at it. You're meeting Ed Koch on Wednesday. Free up your nights, wear a suit and don't bring a date. Oh...don't get fat.

After a breakup, I tend to get hit on more. Even Gio noticed people looking at me tonight. I think it's the lack of sleep, plus, I don't eat much when I'm single. It's nice but my hands are shaking again.

I'm usually the icebreaker of my friends. Some of them (not Gio) "love" the women I'm with but the moment I'm single, they tell me things like, "Oh, I never liked her," to get me back in the scene. Ugh. I hate that. I hate gossip folk.

My exes weren't perfect but I was with them for a reason.

Speaking of which, No. 6 stopped by unexpectedly on Sunday night to pick up some of her things.

For some reason, she looked in the fridge. All it had was protein shakes, rum and PB&J. She laughed when she opened up the freezer and saw the Mac & Cheese and all the veggie burgers.

I wish I could tell you something terribly interesting happened when she was here. She looked amazing. But I'd be lying.

You know, I could survive on protein shakes, rum and PB&J.

Maybe even just the rum.