 |
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
 |
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
LoganLo On (or close to) Schedule |
||
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
|
|
|
Thursday, November 05, 2009 | |
|
||
|
||
|
Durian Location: my room, cleaning Mood: groggy Music: This is how it works You're young until you're not  Got a Hello today from Roberta, the girl I sat next to on the plane years ago. She's in college now and still traveling the globe from Italy. What an interesting world we live in. Had a full-on zero sleep the other night. The insomina's creeping back. Wondering why, but suppose it's just the way it is with me sometimes. Saw the rents the other day and stopped by the local Asian supermarket for cheap produce and such. Saw a lotta non-asians there; laughed to myself only cause I can hardly make heads nor tails outta anything - then again, maybe they're all Asian scholars. Can only imagine onea them picking up say a durian and going, "Why don't I give this a shot?" A lotta young people too bouncing around. That's cool, that they're willing to shop in a joint where the only English spoken's with an accent. Speaking of younger people, a lotta them're convinced that all Republicans're evil and that good things'll happen if everyone's a Democrat. Which is not to say that the Republicans haven't bungled the last several years of power, they have. And there're d-bags and hypocrites on both sidesa the fence. But the fence's sorta my point. There needs to be conflict to make things the way they're supposedta be. Y'know what y'get when you only have one party supported by millions of fanatical young people that are absolutely certain their cause is just, their party righteous? China. Y'get China. Love being Chinese but I cannot stand China. The government's as thuggish and vile as y'can get. Nietzxche once said that "Convictions are more dangerous enemies of truth than lies." The key to not being a jerk is by accepting that y'might be wrong. On that note, suppose I should really try a durian onea these days. YASYCTAI: Have a guest for dinner tomorrow night. This means: clean up. (120 mins/1 pts) Labels: flying, insomnia, quote, random meetings  Subscribe!Permanent Link :: 4 comments ::
Links to this post :: Posted by Me @ 9:16 AM :: |
|
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
Friday, June 19, 2009 | |
|
||
|
||
|
Wannabe Sleepyhead Location: 21:00, yest, eating poorly in Queens Mood: guilty Music: they crowd your bedroom like some thoughts wearing thin Not been sleeping again and've been hitting gym. Tend to look my best when I feel my worst. 16 tabs of ibuprofen and a protein shake for lunch can't possibly be good. Don't it sometimes feel like you're sleepwalking through life? The rain's the only thing that reminds me I'm awake. ---------- Went to see my dad tonight for father's day and got into a terrible argument. We actually get along better than most fathers and sons, but still, there's a reason why children move away. Dunno what you think of me; I'm probably shorter, geekier, and clumsier than you think I am. Or not, dunno. Do have my moments of eloquence - just not with my father. Something about fathers turn logical, dispassionate men into yell-ey, argumentative sons. But, if I had the composure to think of it - and the vocabulary in Chinese to say it - woulda told him this poem by Kahil Gibran: Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, And though they are with you yet they belong not to you. What I actually said was more like, Lemme live my life, ok? Do have my moments of eloquence. But only with strangers reading me on digital ink. Just not with my father, whom I love more than most anything - even the rum - but don't wanna be. YASYCTAI: Have y'ever written an email/letter to your dad? Not easy. Even if y'like writing, it's not easy. (hours/2 pts) Labels: family, father's day, insomnia Subscribe!Permanent Link :: 4 comments ::
Links to this post :: Posted by Me @ 12:03 AM :: |
|
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
Tuesday, February 24, 2009 | |
|
||
|
||
|
Susie Brown's between awake & dreams Location: a brown leather sofa Mood: beat Music: So many dreams swinging out of the blue  Been thinking about names again. Y'ever notice that Susie Derkins' the only character in Calvin and Hobbes that has both a first name and a last name? Or that Charlie Brown's always referred to by his full name? Guess it's cause, even if they didn't think so, they were somebody to someone. The things you think about when you can't sleep... ---------- Met Heartgirl's parents. Good people. And, unlike my my usual modus operandi, I neither broke anything nor fell down any stairs (see my 25 things from two years ago). Actually, that's not true, I did actually stumble a bit down the stairs but no one heard or saw, so don't think that counts. Her: Do you want fruit, pie, or coffee? Me: Yes, please. Stairs - my mortal enemy. Sleep - my elusive drug. ---------- The insomnia's back. Been lying on my bed in that haze between awake and dreams. Imagined I was chewing gum and it turned out to be an earplug. Imagined if I choked and died? How embarrassing - hope that someone'd cover for me. Used to wonder if I were a main character or a bit-player. Suppose we're all a main character to someone. Man, despite the lack of sleep, starting to believe that it might almost matter. YASYCTAI: Turn off the computer and the TV and read a good book. (240 mins/2 pts) Subscribe!Permanent Link :: 4 comments ::
Links to this post :: Posted by Me @ 12:04 AM :: |
|
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
Monday, January 12, 2009 | |
|
||
|
||
|
Swept Away Location: my living room Mood: cautious Music: I know exactly how he feels  Me: You'll meet her Friday - don't tell me what you think of her. Him: Don't tell you? Me: No. Cause I think she's amazing and don't wanna hear it any other way. Friday was Paul's B-day so we headed down to our usual joint. Some shots, some rum, some conversation. The usual NYC twirl. Bumped into a curly-haired blond downtown and she said "Excuse you," with a big toothy smile. I smiled back politely but slipped out the door with Heartgirl by 1AM. Her: Your friends are nice. I can see why you're friends with them. That's not always the case. Me: I'm 35. (pause) Got ridda mosta the jerks by now. Spent mosta Saturday and alla Sunday by myself. Me time is always a good time. Chatted with PCD online for a bit. PCD: You're like an imaginary person now. Me: I find that both funny and sad. Why is that? Her: Because we aren't real life friends Me: Because we never see each other? (thinking) I try to see things from Heartgirl's point of view, if there was a guy she liked a lot and saw him regularly, I'd be a little peeved. (pause) She knows I'd never cheat on her. But I also told her that you were kind and good and that kind and good people we should keep around. I do consider us real friends. Her: I know. Just have a fun vacation, ok? ---------- Her: I kind of feel that I...I just got swept up in my own life. How weird is that? To get swept away by your own life? At the party, met a friend that was easing into single life as I was easing out. One minute, I'm 27 and walking outta the Harbor Hotel in Beijing to a waiting car wearing Valentino and a Speedmaster. The next minute, I'm 33 and out both a girlfriend and alla my scratch. Then the next hot minute, I'm here. Telling my secrets to reeds and strangers. And thinking of a girlie I didn't know existed before 4/7/2008.The problem with being half-asleep alla time is that reality and dreams blur. There've been plenty of times I thought something was something, but just turned out to be a lotta nuthin. Kinda wonder if this'll all just turn out to be nuthin at all. Man...that would suck. Me: Yeah, I know what you mean. ---------- Supposed to be the coldest weather here in NYC in 15 years. But I'm leaving this week for sunnier climates and'll, thankfully, miss it. I'll write when I can. YASYCTAI: Get ridda mosta your jerks. Screw em. (time/3 pts) Labels: dialogue, hope, insomnia, nostalgia, usual twirl Subscribe!Permanent Link :: 3 comments ::
Links to this post :: Posted by Me @ 12:01 AM :: |
|
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
Friday, December 19, 2008 | |
|
||
|
||
|
Potential Location: On a corduroy couch Mood: sick Music: Maybe I'll sleep when I am dead But now it's like the night is taking sides  Her: Algebra - pretty much any math. Me: I'm a terrible Asian; math was never a fun class for me. Mine were English and history. Some science was cool too - like when we dissected owl pellets. (pause) Did you ever have a trapper keeper? Her: Yes. Me: (thinking) Man, they sucked. Didn't trap or keep a damn thing. Think I'm sick. Not sure. But quite possibly. It's been a really productive week. Trying to wrap up business issues before the end of the year. For what seems to be the third year in a row, I've not been able to really enjoy my favorite time of year; from the day before Thanksgiving to the day after New Year's. Wish I were clearheaded. Always cloudy cause I'm sick, I'm beat, or I'm bending time. Sometimes all three at once. Then my mind wanders. Me: What if I'm not smart at all? What if I just remember things - stupid things. Things that're only good for games shows and cocktail conversations? Smart people don't get their life savings stolen. My brother and sister're smart - I joke a lot that I get by on my charm. (pause) But what if that's true? Her: (thinking) I think you're smart. At least 50% of the time I don't sleep, lie awake wondering. Everyone thinks I've got all this potential. But it's almost 2009. I'm another year closer to getting my ticket punched.When I don't sleep, lie awake wondering about things that I'm afraid to put out in the aether. YASYCTAI: Read a novel. A good one. (eight days/2 pts) Subscribe!Permanent Link :: 4 comments ::
Links to this post :: Posted by Me @ 12:16 AM :: |
|
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
Monday, November 17, 2008 | |
|
||
|
||
|
Tennis anyone? Location: one hour ago, the F train in Queens Mood: committed Music: when we met Spending all of my time Tracing your silhouette  Me: I have tennis elbow. Her: Lateral epicondalitis? Me: Whoa... Smart people're just so impressive. Ladies, don't ever dumb yourself down for a guy cause the guy you'll end up with, you won't want.---------- Sheridan invited me another party this past Saturday. Nice enough crowd; attractive people, booze. Malik Yoba was there as was my favorite type of rum, although it was $14 a glass again. Crap. Ended up taking a ton of pics for the host and he offered for me to shoot for his website. Maybe. Sheridan and I bounced early cause I wasn't feeling all that great - did my yearly physical, got some blood drawn, found out I have tennis elbow, and had a flu shot - alla which was draining (literally and figuratively). So stayed in Saturday night even though Paul, Gio and LisaV each had parties going on. I've not been sleeping. Dunno if it's the stress, the pain or the fact that Heartgirl's not around. So I'm reading a lot again: This week alone, I read The ABS Diet, first four chapters of Hot, Flat and Crowded, coupla articles on SEO marketing, two issues of the Economist and Fast Company, and three of Maximum Computer. On a somewhat related note, I've decided to get down to 9% body fat or less, which I've not been since froshmore year college (a hundred years ago). Wish me luck. A lotta stuff''s going on. Lemme sort it all out and get back to you.  YASYCTAI: Have you had your yearly physical? (60 mins/3 pts) Labels: dialogue, discussion, insomnia Subscribe!Permanent Link :: 3 comments ::
Links to this post :: Posted by Me @ 12:24 AM :: |
|
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
Wednesday, October 08, 2008 | |
|
||
|
||
|
This time Location: wide-awake in my pad Mood: nostalgic Music: I wish I knew the time that I've taken I pray is not wasted  Saw Gio tonight off Times Square. It was a networking thingy and they had some good rum. Probably not a good idea since I went fencing afterward. The weird thing is that it was across the street from my old pad. Hadn't been there in a while. Ayn Rand wrote of NYC in The Fountainhead: I would give the greatest sunset in the world for one sight of New York's skyline....When I see the city from my window - no, I don't feel how small I am - but I feel that if a war came to threaten this, I would throw myself into space, over the city, and protect these buildings with my body. Y'know when you love someone, you'd end anyone that'd do them harm? It's like that.Wish I could put it in my pocket and pull it out to show you Nino's where I had the best Penne with Vodka Sauce, or the Algonquin Hotel where I'd wish I had dough or the chops to sit at the Vicious Circle, or my corner on 46th and 6th Avenue, where I'd sneak a cigarette at 3AM when I couldn't sleep and wait for the sun to come up. Or my office at 1500 Broadway where I'd look out and see TRL being recorded with those freakin kids screaming. OK, that I got a picture of. Feel so damn nostalgic. Wanted to talk to Heartgirl about it but she was busy. S'ok, I'm hoping we have plenty of time to talk about these kinda things. Speaking of Heartgirl, she doesn't wanna show up here. So I won't write of her anymore. Maybe she'll change her mind but don't think so. Cause she thinks that this is a blog about me being a womanizer - but that's just the marketing message. Me: It's not. (pause) The truth is, it's the story of a boy like me looking for a girlie like you. (thinking) And hoping, I mean really, really hoping, that this time, it'll be different. YASYCTAI: Post a picture of your neighborhood for me (5 mins/1 pt) Subscribe!Permanent Link :: 1 comments ::
Links to this post :: Posted by Me @ 1:16 AM :: |
|
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
Wednesday, June 04, 2008 | |
|
||
|
||
|
Guernica Location: 21:00 yest, thrust, parry, thrust on the UWS Mood: tired Music: The old man said to me Said don't always take life so seriously  Stopped by a friend's house midday in Queens cause I was around the hood but he was out so his wife and I caught up. She wants to fix me up with some of her doctor friends. I'm not sure she knows what she's getting them into. ---------- Picasso's Guernica is probably one of the most famous paintings of suffering out there. Buddhism says that suffering comes from the uncontrollable. Either externally, such as in the painting, or internally, when we try to control the uncontrollable. I believe that. On a related note, man, I wish I could fall asleep. Of course, there is no great tragedy without some small gain(s): I'm completely caught up on Lost and BSG, can now do all my sabre strikes with my left hand and have made a month's worth of chili. I'm thinking of brushing up my German or teaching myself Arabic or something. I dunno. I'd rather sleep. Lost is still surprisingly good (I can't believe they killed off ______). BSG...almost as good. Labels: art, discussion, insomnia Subscribe!Permanent Link :: 0 comments ::
Links to this post :: Posted by Me @ 12:38 AM :: |
|
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
Friday, May 09, 2008 | |
|
||
|
||
|
Elsewho Location: 19:00 yest, Malachy's with Heidi and Buckley Mood: sotted Music: I used to go out to parties and stand around Rain: Can I borrow your phone? Me: (absentmindedly) Sure. Rain: Here you go.Me: Thanks. Hey - what'd you do? Rain: Nuthin! So paranoid...I'm in a 300 year old building in Passau that's been converted to apartments. The ceilings are high with wooden floors and painted on the entire far wall is a pop art portrait of a blond girl crying. Honey and Katherine are there. We'd just gotten back from Vienna. A woman I love is there too. She whispers her nonsense word into my ear and I whisper mine back. We're having an early dinner of pasta when Marvin Gaye comes on. Honey shrieks, and jumps onto the table to dance when my girl pulls me up and says, "You too" as I laugh and follow. She smiles, turns back to me and says - (phone alarm rings, it's 5:15AM in NYC) Me: (sit up and look groggily at phone) Dammit Rain...dammit... Fall back into bed and plot revenge against Rain. Sigh. Toss off covers. Flip on Ghosts of Goodbye and start doing situps as ghosts fade away. Eins, zwei, drei...  Subscribe!Permanent Link :: 0 comments ::
Links to this post :: Posted by Me @ 12:03 AM :: |
|
|
||
|
||
|
||
|
Friday, February 08, 2008 | |
|
||
|
||
|
Safe Location: in my apartment, cleaning Mood: cloudy Music: oh, how I need Someone to watch over me  Over Xmas, I wasn't sleeping causa the work drama. But my brother came to visit. I remember laying down on the floor where he was working and passing out. It was the first poison-free sleep I had in two months. I suppose you're all sick and tired hearing about Heath Ledger. I liked his films, but that's about it. He mighta been a prince or a scumbag, I dunno. But I had myself a little freakout when I read about how he died. Cause he's the same type of insomniac as me; his mind was "always racing," he said and "pills failed to work." That's me. Good god, it's wretched misery. There's this line that goes, Everyone dies alone. But that's just horses___. Most people don't die alone. But what a way to go if you do. Poor bastard. Sorry, I'm sick and moody. On a happy note, it was Chinese New Year yesterday (xin nian quai le!). I took the day off, saw the family and ate my weight in dumplings. On an even happier note, it's the weekend.  Labels: depression, heath ledger, insomnia Subscribe!Permanent Link :: 0 comments ::
Links to this post :: Posted by Me @ 12:09 AM :: |
|
|
||
|
||
|
||
| Don't you have better things to do than read ridiculous small print from some writer? Oh yeah, © 2006 Logan Lo, LLC. All rights reserved. |
